Monday, May 24, 2010

The victim is still never to blame, folks, let's get our shit together here.

Hi HollaBack,

I didn't snap a photo of this guy, because I didn't know/couldn't believe what was happening until much later:

Two friends and I took the downtown 6 train from 86th street to 14th street, about 6:45 on Saturday evening. The train was PACKED. I was pressed up against some dude, my back to his front. I felt something around my butt, but couldn't tell what is was--I suspected a penis, but wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. I made a face at my friends, who told me to elbow him, but I couldn't really tell what was happening. I could feel his heart beating against my back, but again, it was crowded, sweaty, etc. Eventually I was able to move. Fine. When the train crowds eased up a bit I realized I had something on my backside, and on my legs. We got out at 14th street, went to a restaurant, and I checked the dress in the bathroom--the man definitely came on me.

I called the police the next day, and they came by my apartment to take a report, but it was mortifying--they kept questioning everythinng I said, and one officer "repeated back" to me what I had allegedly told him, not letting me correct his mistakes, and told me "I have a great memory so I know exactly what you said." Eventually his supervisor came by, and she was nicer, and more sympathetic, but the
message was clear: why would you let someone stand that close to you, and why wouldn't you say anything (at the time, or right afterward). The whole experience was awful, but I don't really know what I could have done differently--I didn't want to turn around to face the guy, and figured that SEEING him would be worse than feeling him, but I had no idea that he must have had his penis out.

Completely disgusting, and the cops' attitude made it worse.

Submitted by Sarah

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